We should all be feminists...

We were introduced to an excerpt of Nigerian writer Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie on Beyonce's song "Flawless."  This excerpt really spoke to me because it is the truth, it is my truth!  I have met people who are shocked that I am 29 with no children not that I don't want them.  I have been asked multiple times "when are you gonna have a baby?"   You begin to wonder why men and women aren't taught the same messages, why are their double standards in life?  Why have the negative depictions of men and women we see on TV become the norm?

I believe it is my purpose in life to mentor young women.  To tell each of them that they can have their own thoughts, be in charge of themselves.  Have their own opinion. Be free.  Be firm.  That it is ok to strive to have a wonderful, loving marriage but to be able to also pursue their dreams.  I believe you can have it all as a woman.  
Do not allow anyone to limit you and please do not limit yourself, ever!

We teach girls to shrink themselves
To make themselves smaller
We say to girls
"You can have ambition
But not too much
You should aim to be successful
But not too successful
Otherwise you will threaten the man"
Because I am female
I am expected to aspire to marriage
I am expected to make my life choices
Always keeping in mind that
Marriage is the most important
Now marriage can be a source of
Joy and love and mutual support
But why do we teach to aspire to marriage
And we don't teach boys the same?
We raise girls to each other as competitors
Not for jobs or for accomplishments
Which I think can be a good thing
But for the attention of men
We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings
In the way that boys are
Feminist: the person who believes in the social
Political, and economic equality of the sexes


  1. Exactly people kept asking me the same thing after I graduated college...when are you going to have kids as if that was my only aspiration smdh....

  2. I absolutely loved this speech. I watched her TEDtalks as well... very inspiring

    Confessions Of A City Girl

  3. You should check our her book Americanah, I really liked it.


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